Over the weekend, I went to the mall (which really should not come as a shock to anyone, given my love for the retail arts). As I walked the corridor, I was rudely awakened to the fact that summer is coming. And with this new season, modesty is apparently taking a vacation.

Despite the chilly, rainy weather outside, all I saw indoors were girls dressed in itty-bitty shorts and low cut tank tops. Window displays showcased skimpy suits and skirts that look like they should fit a toddler. I actually started to dread the coming summer months.

In hopes that modesty doesn’t have to be absent everywhere, I’d like to encourage each of you to take time to remind your girls about the importance of dressing modestly. Here are a few ideas:

• Go shopping. 1 Thessalonians 4:4-5 (NIV) says, “That each of you should learn to control his [or her] own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God.” The problem is that we shop at the same stores as the heathen. Unless we all start making our own clothes (which is a viable option) we’re still going to have to shop at the mall. So, why not take a trip to the mall and show the girls how to shop with modesty in mind. If you find yourself to be a little trend-challenged, enlist the help of an older girl who consistently dresses modestly.

• Make it clear. Sometimes, girls just aren’t aware of the boundaries for modesty. At the beginning of the summer, it doesn’t hurt to let girls know what’s expected (specifically for church/church events). Make sure you address it from a loving standpoint without making any girls feel singled out.

• Demonstrate. Have girls choose some of their favorite modest outfits to wear in a fashion show. Have fun with it. This could be incorporated in a sleepover or retreat. Consider inviting a special speaker to come in and talk to the girls about the importance of modesty and purity.

• Call for backup. Invite a male pastor or youth pastor to talk to the girls. Recently, our youth pastor came and talked with our girls. We called it “Everything a Christian Girl Ever Needed to Know from a Christian Guy Who Isn’t Her Dad or Brother.” We let the girls ask questions. Sometimes it helps just to have the things female leaders say repeated by a male leader. (A couple of weeks later, the female leaders did the same with the guys small group. We had a lot of fun. I was pleasantly surprised by some of the questions the boys asked.)

OK, I’m starting to look forward to summer again.

The other day, I was driving and noticed a line of trees. They all appeared to be the same kind of tree, but they were all in different stages of budding. I thought it was so strange that a group of trees, all exposed to the same elements (same amount of sunlight, rain, wind, soil conditions, etc.) could all look so different. One had branches full of leaves, some were just starting to bud, and a few had several buds starting to open.

I realized that none of the trees were jealous of the tree that was already full and leafy. Trees don’t get nervous when things seem to be taking too long. None of the trees were saying, “Boy, I wish I could grow like that,” or “Wow, look how awesome I am at growing!” Not only are trees inanimate objects that don’t have feelings (unless we’re talking about the trees from Lord of the Rings), but also, trees don’t really control their own growth. Trees sit and soak up the sun and rain. Trees simply abide.

As I came to this realization, I was reminded of what Jesus said in John 15:4-7 (NASB)“Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me. I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing. If anyone does not abide in Me, he is thrown away as a branch and dries up; and they gather them, and cast them into the fire and they are burned. If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.”

So, let’s take a cue from the trees. As we abide in Christ, and He abides in us, we will bear fruit. We need to be aware that this is happening not only in our own lives, but in the lives of everyone around us. Instead of being critical or envious when others are bearing fruit, we need to be encouraging and supportive. When those around us are struggling to abide and bear fruit, let’s avoid judging and seek to support them.

It’s so simple, but it’s so easy to forget. We don’t need to try to bear fruit. We don’t have to strive to achieve or accomplish anything. All we have to do is abide in Christ and he will be faithful to cause us to bear fruit.

The birds are chirping, trees are budding, flowers are blooming, and kids are itching to get out of school. Soon, daylight will be at a maximum and responsibility will be at a minimum. This can be a pretty difficult time of year to try to do “church as usual.” However, this time of year can provide great opportunities to change things up. Here are some warm weather ministry ideas:

Take it outside. Since your girls are daydreaming about the beautiful weather, move your small group outside. Let your girls go for a walk, play a game outside, or just sit in the grass and talk. The most boring of topics will take on new meaning with fresh air.

Do something for someone else. The nice weather provides ample opportunities for outdoor ministry. Organize a clean-up day at church, pick up trash at a park, or help church members with yard work. The girls will enjoy working together and feel good after a day of helping someone else.

Focus on Relationships. Not being in school can provide more opportunities for spending time having fun and getting to know one another. Take this time to get to know girls and encourage their relationships with one another. Plan sleepovers, mini golf outings, picnics, and other activities to mix things up.

Encourage Summer Reading. No school means no required reading. Long road trips and lounging by the pool can be a great time to read a thought-provoking book. Choose a book to read and discuss together or be ready to suggest books for your girls to read as an alternative to gossip magazines or other popular books.

Summer can be a great time to help your girls take the next step in their relationship with God while they’re free from the distractions of school and many of their extracurricular activities. Enjoy your sunny days with your girls!

When I think I about the women who really had an impact on my life, there’s not a Britney, Christina, or Jessica among them. (There wasn’t a Miley, Vanessa, or Leighton when I was growing up, but I’m sure they would have been omitted as well.) In part, this is due to my parents’ wisdom in helping me choose TV shows and music, but also in large part due to the fact that I had no want for female role models, though the names of my role models are much less recognizable.

My list includes my mom, who was there for every important decision ranging from accepting Christ to choosing a prom dress; Pastor Laurie, my children’s pastor who laid a solid foundation for my relationship with the Lord; Tricia, who thought is was important enough to attend my eighth-grade musical that she drove eight hours through the night after the East Middle School presentation of Bye Bye, Birdie so she wouldn’t miss it; and Melissa, who showed me what it means to really invest in the lives of girls.

It’s completely natural for teenage girls to look for role models – someone to watch as they navigate the minefield of adolescence. It’s even biblical. In 1 Corinthians 11:1 (NIV) Paul says, “Follow my example as I follow the example of Christ.”

No one is perfect. Pop princesses and pastors alike will disappoint eventually. There really is no perfect role model aside from Christ, but as girls see leaders living out exactly what it means to be a woman of God on a daily basis, they will learn from your example.

Right now, it might not seem like you’re having a greater impact on your girls than the pop stars and actresses of the world, but know that your faithfulness and consistency counts. Miley will probably never attend your girls’ soccer games. Britney won’t be teaching godly principles to your girls on a regular basis. Jamie Lynn probably won’t be taking your girls out for coffee.

Your consistent presence in your girls’ lives counts.

As you invest in the lives of girls, remember that though the girls may not wear your face on their T-shirts, sing along with your hit singles, or buy magazines with you on the cover, your life is an example they will follow.

By Sherrie Batty

If you are speaking about a particular subject with your girls, and you feel that your point would be further enhanced with an illustration, consider showing a video from GodTube or YouTube. You can begin your lesson with the video to make an immediate impression or start discussion, or talk about your point, then illustrate it with a video.

Just as an example, consider the topic of beauty and how media images set a standard that is imposed upon girls and women. You can show the following video from Dove’s Campaign for Real Beauty about airbrushing to illustrate how media images alter what we know of reality.

Other examples: use a music video as a fun opening, or background while they think; play a video of a current event, such as news coverage on a school shooting to get discussion started, and help the girls to express their thoughts and feelings on the subject then lead into a Biblical Christian response in times like these or pray; if you feel someone else has said something better than you can say it show that someone else in a video clip.

By Sherrie Batty

Featured in the current National Girls Ministries Leaders Connection online newsletter, under the Teen Girl Ministries section are two articles about 1) the importance of developing your vision, and 2) how to practically go from having a vision to creating a great resource group or event for teen girls. The author, Misty Price, has created a sexual purity ministry within her church that has received recognition within her community. She tells how she went from seeing a need, to having a vision, to creating a ministry.

Leaders Connection is produced bimonthly and features a Teen Girl Ministries section with articles discussing aspects of ministering to teen girls. To sign up for Leaders Connection E-Newsletters to be sent to your e-mail inbox sign up here.

By Sherrie Batty

Brio Magazine, produced by Focus on the Family, is offering a Mother-Daughter getaway cruise for February 14-18, 2008. See the schedule below. The cost is $148 for the conference including speakers like Susie Shellenberger, Dannah Gresh, Gracia Burnham, an improv group, etc. There are various lodging options with most under $800. You can sign up at Briocruise.com. We all know that parents have the greatest impact on the girls we lead, so consider going online and printing off the brochure (pdf) to hand out to your girls’ moms. Or if you love the idea of a cruise yourself, be a surrogate mom!

4 DAYS CRUISING THE BAHAMAS ABOARD THE CARNIVAL “CELEBRATION”
If you’ve dreamed of swimming with dolphins, a snorkel safari at Pearl Island, glass-bottom boat excursions, shopping in the Bahamas, eating way-yummy food and laughing till your sides hurt, you have a chance to make your dreams come true! Let the Carnival Celebration’s eight-deck-high water world dazzle you beyond your imagination.

FEBRUARY 14, 2008—DEPARTING JACKSONVILLE, FLORIDA—4 P.M.

FEBRUARY 15—FREEPORT, BAHAMAS—12 NOON TO 7 P.M.
Freeport is a sportsman’s paradise with endless opportunities for snorkeling, sailing and scuba diving. If shopping is your sport, you’re sure to score big at the duty-free shops, where you can find excellent deals on cameras, watches, porcelain and fine jewelry. Or you can just kick back and enjoy the sun on one of the many gorgeous, white-sand beaches.

FEBRUARY 16—HALF MOON CAY, BAHAMAS—9 A.M. TO 7 P.M.
The Half Moon Cay is ideal for beach lovers, water sports and nature enthusiasts. Snorkel among the coral reefs, or paddle boat in the crystal clear bay. This island is a designated wild bird sanctuary with nature trails leading visitors to ideal vantage points for bird watching.

FEBRUARY 17—“FUN DAY AT SEA”
What makes a Carnival “Fun Day at Sea” so special? It’s packed with activities to keep you smiling, from deck games and lively entertainment to a relaxing massage and leisurely al fresco lunch on the Lido deck.

FEBRUARY 18, 2008—CONCLUDING IN JACKSONVILLE, FLORIDA

Blog By Sherrie Batty

This is the title of a feature article in the September/October Today’s Christian Woman magazine by T. Suzanne Eller. Eller starts out her article by sharing her harrowing experience of visiting a lingerie store, and intervening in a situation where a teen girl was trying on lingerie, and allowing the guys she came with to view her in the dressing room. Eller intervened where the store manager would not.

Maybe you have not found yourself exactly in this situation, but you might have felt similar discomfort and indignation when driving by a billboard with a photo of a woman, seductive in nature, standing in the grocery store line shielding your children’s eyes from the magazine rack at their eye level, or clicking off the television set as the latest base Hardee’s/Carls Jr. commercial slimes it’s way into your home. Hardee’s/Carls Jr. is now not synonymous with burgers, but with their unappetizing display of soft porn, turning away women (and their husbands) of all ages from frequenting their burger joints. If you can relate to these scenarios, you understand the feeling that must have risen up in Eller. Hardee’s is right with one thing, women are now the meat being sold, and girls who don’t remember when not all commercials and shows were sexualized, are falling prey to the lie that their value lies in their willingness to gratify males of the character found in the youth in Proverbs 7.

So what can you do? If you know any better than the message being sold then you pity the poor girls who give in to this outrageous cultural/media driven message, but are you living as Titus 2:4,5 encourages, “…training the younger women?” Eller found that going straight to the girls is the best method to combat the cultural message she sees, through mentoring. She also recommends: prayer; gentle example; joining a community (e.g.; One Million Moms); writing networks and fashion executives; and withdrawing monetary support by watching quality programming vs. shows and companies promoting the degradation of women.

If you’re not familiar with the depths to which Hardees/Carls Jr. commercials dip, you can find their commercials here.

By Sherrie Batty

Focus on the Family periodically features broadcasts that have teen girls as their focus topic. They have featured Dannah Gresh, author of “And the Bride Wore White,” Leslie Ludy, author of “When God Writes Your Love Story,” and other women who minister to teen girls.

Good Advice for Teen Girls
October 5th the featured broadcast speaker will be Dr. James Dobson’s own daughter Danae Dobson. She will speak about her book “Let’s Talk,” which features advice to teen girls from her on spiritual and relational issues. Learn more about Danae in this Christianity Today article.

Parenting an Online Generation (1&2)
October 8th & 9th Vicki Courtney, author of TeenVirtue and TeenVirtue2, among other works, will speak about parenting technology-dependent kids. Courtney’s latest book “Logged On and Tuned Out: a non-techie’s guide to parenting a tech savvy generation,” released September 1.

If your local radio station does not carry the Focus on the Family broadcasts, or you are busy during the broadcast times, consider checking out the Focus on the Family podcasts. Or just listen online.

 By Sherrie Batty

This is our first post, and we are excited to be able to bring you the latest about everything teen girl.

This blog is a place for you to find out about newly released materials that will help you minister to the girls in your church and community. You will also find the latest news bites about events or that affect teen girls. Occassionally we will throw in an idea, and/or reflection in general about ministering to teen girls. If you have ideas for topics you want to hear about, feel free to e-mail me at tgm@ag.org.

Let the blog begin!